Wednesday, January 27, 2010
last.hate the feeling to be the last to know. that squeezing feeling of the heart....it's too hard to remove.
laughter.what's after the laughter?
it happened to me so suddenly.
tears after laughter.
rolling down the cheeks without warning.
all at once, my laughter feels so fake.
my cheeks felt tired with the tensed muscles.
a suddely release of strained muscles....
too sudden.
a moment ago, i thought i was relatively happy.
another moment, i felt....
what is all these happy emotions about?
it feels so superficial.
and all these became transient.
it seems my mask had been taken off.
the mask that i put on all the time,
removed in an instant....
so quick that i couldn't react.
so...my laughter was a mask after all.
a mask that hasn't been removed after a long long time.
why am i laughing anyway?
why?
where am i?
Swallowtail 11:42:00 PM
Monday, January 25, 2010
swallowtail butterfly.fly like it.
fighting,
towards the end of life.
not to waste a moment.
i shall awaken.
swallowtail.
Swallowtail 7:14:00 PM
sign.i haven't been ranting here. it's a good sign.
a sign which means i'm having peace in my heart.
haven't been doing much reflections about myself in this new year.
probably i learnt to love myself. see my abilities.
accept.i'm learning to accept the fact,
that i am who i am.
and it's not the end of world,
if i can't get it.
the earth still revolves.
a food for thought here.
life. life will not be complicated,
as long as you keep it simple.
strings won't come in knots,
unless you go rounds and rounds.
we tend to get lost with the strings in our hands at times.
but learn to walk out of it. not into it.
you'll get knots.
find the root of problem,
not to avoid the problem.
face yourself in the mirror,
not the lies you created.
look around you and observe,
not to look and jump to conclusions.
think before you act,
not to act and think after that.
be brave,
not be a tortoise. (i think a tortoise has more courage)
last of all,
walk straight, forward,
not backwards.
look back at times though,
for experience.
experience is there to help you,
not to trip you.
look to experience for guidance,
not for hindrance.
and there you are.
walk forth. there's a wonderful life going on.
Swallowtail 12:26:00 AM
Saturday, January 16, 2010
new.i need a new blogskin. i'm still looking for inspiration. so pardon me for the moment.
missing.i miss the time when i hang around with my camera.
i miss the time when i loved taking photos.
i miss the time when i know what i want.
i'm missing my old self.
the missing piece of puzzle in me,
that's been lost in the midst of chaos.
missing me.
Swallowtail 4:12:00 PM